The Stalker: A Nepkat fanfiction
by QueenofTime
Summary: Anna u ass
1. Chapter 1

Once there was a female-ish troll named Nepeta who happened to be very kawaii. She also happened to have a flushed crush for one boy-ish troll named Karkat Vantas. They would've gone on with a normal relationship if it weren't for one girl-ish human thing named Anna RussianlastnameIcan'tspell. She didn't ruin it, she made sure it happened. She was a supervisor of sorts but Nepkat was her OTP and it just had to happen. Where did this girl come from? Where did she go? They'll never really know.


	2. Chapter 2 (Jake and Anna's incident)

Anna was a simple girl, simple enough at least. She had come from Russia to some place and then found her way onto Alternia. She happened to have a friend named Jake, well not really a friend, and no not Jake English, his name was Jake Mead, and he was a pervert. Anyone would tell you that. He was also an idiot and he happened to have one giant right boob, named Jacboob. Who knows how he grew it but all we know is that it talks and Jake prefers not to wear a bra for some reason. Okay, on with our story.

Anna was walking down the street, to an empty office that Jake had obtained somehow, probably with fake money. They were cosplaying, kind of. Anna had painted herself grey and had fake horns. She was told to come naked which she did. Anna was an idiot for doing this.

Once she arrived she found Jake dancing with a rake, she knew he was sexually attracted to rakes and thought she had walked in on some odd mating ritual. "Your turn" He said, looking like a stoner and handing her the rake. In one swift movement Anna stuck her foot up his ass and whispered in his ear "Nigga I aint fuckin' playin'" He grunted pleasurably as Anna's broken foot limply wiggled in his ass.

Anna battle-cried and attempted to sacrifice Jake to the gods and convince dirk baby razortonguevaginaeyes to shove his razor tongue down Jake's throat. The gods accepted Jake's soul but dirk baby razortonguevaginaeyes refused to do the deed, much to Jake's dissatisfaction.

Jake began to sing the song of his people as Anna tightened a noose around his neck. "If you don't shut your fucking pie hole I'm gonna slice Jacboob off" Jacboob began to cry boob tears because his gay dreams were going to be shattered at Anna's hands if he were to be sliced off. Jake held Jacboob defensively and sang him a lullaby. "You know what you little shit you goin' down" She said, pulling out a shovel. She beat him til he died. He didn't actually die he woke back up and just made Anna angry by singing louder.

Anna screeched and threw Jake, Jacboob and the rake out the window. Jake screamed as he hit the ground, he didn't hit it, Jacboob did and Jake rolled over. Jacboob was dead. Jake let out another scream, the rake had impaled his dick. He died of sadness (from Jacboob dying), from pain (the rake), and from the sound his dying sperm made.


	3. The ruined date

Nepeta and Karkat left the earth restraunt they had been eating at, with Nepeta licking the remnants of meat off her fingers and Karkat sucking up an Earth drink through a straw. "Wow, these Earth places are purrfect!" Nepeta exclaimed. Karkat grumbled in response and kept walking. "Oh Karkitty, cheer up!" She said, pulling at the corners of her mouth to form a goofy smile. He flashed a small smile that soon faded, his nervous walking eventually led them in a shrub maze near by.

Anna had flee'd the scene of Jake's death, she certainly did not want to be arrested for three things (Jake, Jacboob, and Jake's dick) dying. She'd escaped to a nearby shrub maze, in hopes no one would suspect a 14 year old grey naked horn wearer. Anna figured no one would be in the Maze, it wasn't a common funtimes place unless you want to smoke a joint without getting caught.

As she hid in a shrub, plotting her next move, she heard a couple approach. She stiffened and stared out through the leaves. Walking through was a cat-like girl and a guy that look like a raccoon who had been run over. Anna suddenly whispered "OTP" and the two looked up in surprise. She faded back into the branches so she would not be seen but she was grinning like a maniac.

With the couple navigating through the maze, Anna was crawling through the shrubs, not minding the red scratches that now covered her body. She silently repeated OTP in her mind, attempting to get a picture of the two unknowing trolls. One might think Anna insane, but she was just making sure her ship didn't sink.

Once the couple, along with their stalker, reached the middle, Anna climbed to the top of the shrub, going unnoticed. Karkat began speaking, much to everyone's surprise. "Okay, so Nepeta, there's something I've been wanting to do for a long time" He said, leaning in a bit. "Mhm" Nepeta said with a hopeful look. Karkat was blushing cherry red as he placed a hand on Nepeta's cheek. The moment he leaned in more Anna let out a loud sob. The couple broke away and Karkat took a step back. "NO!" Anna screamed "TOUCH MOUTHS!" She let out a wild cry, she practically sank her own ship. "Who the fuck are you?" Karkat shouted at her. She was crying too hard to respond, she dropped off the bush onto the ground and rolled around. "Is she from Alternia?" Nepeta whispered to Karkat, examining Anna's scratched grey body. "GOD DAMMIT ANNA NOT AGAIN!" A voice shrieked from behind a bush. A girl emerged from the bush, shovel in hand. "SAM! MAKE THEM KISS!" Anna wailed. "You pudding head, they were just about to!" Sam glared. Anna cried louder as Nepeta and Karkat backed away. "I'm done with you" Sam said, slamming the shovel into Anna's skull and dragging her away.


End file.
